Recipe Re-invented-Or, Hot Pumpkin

        

             I have a pumpkin soup recipe that I have made since I taught preschool 15 years ago. I got the recipe out of a curriculum book that I copied the page from. (I bought the book. I just wanted a copy in my recipe mess (more about my recipe mess another time)). Tonight it occurred to me, I don't make the recipe that is on the paper. I make my own recipe entirely different from looking at it. My recipe comes out sweet and the other one is garlicky with ham in it. Hmmm. Not only that, I don't even eat mine. I drink it out of a mug. 
           I told my husband, "This isn't even a soup. It is a drink. Like Hot Chocolate. Or Hot Vanilla (love that!). I am going to actually write down this recipe and post it. Then I can throw away the other one, that I have never even used. 
So, I hope you enjoy it. Here it is;

Hot Pumpkin

3 cans (15 oz. ) of Pumpkin

6 cups milk

1 cup brown sugar, packed

1/2 - 1 tsp pumpkin spice

1 tsp vanilla

1. Mix all ingredients into a pan (or Crockpot) and warm until hot. Be careful not to burn or curdle the milk.
2. Drink. You can add a dollop of whipped cream and sprinkle cinnamon on top.

I whipped the drink in the cups with my frother. 

If you heat it in a crockpot, you can leave it in there on warm for several hours. Stir occasionally. 

This serves many. 

Options: 

• You could use whipping cream for a richer flavor.
• You can add cocoa powder for a chocolate pumpkin (that is  yummy too.)
• You could use almond, or coconut milk or another alternative milk for  a more healthful drink. Since Pumpkin is full of vitamins.
• This is a good drink to put in a To Go cup and give to the neighbors.

Let me know how you like it. 

Rainbows And Cupcakes

Girlie is carrying around a teacup, telling us it is full of rainbows.
Little boyo grabs her cup and makes a big slurp noise.
"He stole my rainbow!" comes the umbelievimg girlie.
I am unflustered. Without skipping a beat, I say,"Spit it out." holding the cup to his lips.
He pretends to spit it out.
Girlie screams, "Now it's all wet!"
Of course.
Why didn't I think of that?
Little boyo doesn't want to be out done. Says back very authoritative, "I can only burp cupcakes. "

And that was my day.

My Oil Is Overflowing.

        

            There are so many things in my life that 20 years ago I never would have thought I would do or be able to do. Some I am proud of, some I am still stunned. I had such a small vision of what I wanted to do with my life. I have fulfilled what I wanted to do, I suppose. I just hadn't thought of all that goes with it. When I dreamed of my life, this is where I went;
I wanted to be married to a man that adored me. Check
I wanted 2 kids. Check. Well, double check that one.
I wanted a boy and a girl. Check, check, check and ... check.
I wanted to live in a big house with a yard and a garden. Been there done that. Now I am moving on from that.
I wanted to stay home with my kids and raise them. Well, got that one covered and then some.
I wanted to be the mom that was home all day to bake cookies for when the kids came home from school, have a nice dinner, etc. Use that time during the day to get things done so I could be with my kids as they needed me when they got home. Well, curve ball number one. And it is a doozy!
Homeschooling changes that one enormously. I may have been too attached to the one where I stay home with my kids...

             After all of that life didn't seem to factor into my ideas of what it would all be like.
I never thought I'd have 4 kids. Or homeschool. That was for weird people. Freaks. I never thought I could have survived, much less, thrived through all we have been through in our marriage.
My husband and I look back over our 20 years that we have been together and we can easily see where God's hand has been. We can look at the "tapestry" and see the beautiful colors ALL weaved together. The dark sad times with the joyful happy times. Woven together are so pretty.
I always wonder about the stretching times. The times when you feel like God is just asking too much. I mean does HE really not get that I haven't had enough time to get my husbands underwear washed yet? And there is a funky smell in the bathroom that I haven't bleached out yet. There are dinners to cook, curriculum to decide, hiney's to wipe, and all of the other practicules  that keep a family of 6 just treading water. Not to mention, but we must to have, any joy, just that,... joyful things. Going to the beach, walks in the harbor, playing catch with the boys, watching the boys football games, teaching the littles to swim. These things take up time that is necessary as well.
            Then HE hits me a ball out in left field. Really. Not one I expected. I am now on the board of my homeschool group. I'm sorry, doesn't having 4 kids exempt me from being asked? Doesn't that job belong to someone with one, MAYBE 2 kids? Well, this year, God said, "NO!" It is my turn He says.
I pray often that God will send me a burning bush like Moses to make it pretty clear the direction I am supposed to go. I have ignored and justified my way out of not following God's prompts before. Well, it hurts in many ways when you are praying for God to use you and you choke when HE calls. HE makes you realize it would be much easier to just do the difficult task HE asks then... NOT. Either He will give you a swift kick in the back side or worse, HE will find someone else and pass by you the next time. "I guess that one can't be trusted to be given any responsibility."
           Well, as the offer was made to lead this group, I sat prepared to give my regrets and apologies that there was no way I should even be  expected to do the job she was asking.
         Then there it was. The burning bush. Right there. I think I even started to laugh a little and said under my breath. Well, there it is. The burning bush. Even my husband, whom I pray with often, said as I repeated all that the person who asked me had said to me, "Well, how's that burning bush looking to you?"
Which was funny because he also was prepared for me to say no. Remember, he is still waiting for his clean underwear.
            That is when my mind started to go into a state of shock. As e-mails and phone calls and meetings start taking place to frantically get some things done before the school year started for most of us, I started wondering how I could hide from it all. "WHAT HAVE I DONE!!" Really. There aren't any spare moments that are around, unless I stop sleeping (which is what I am doing to write this). Really, I do my daughters hair often while I am going potty myself. (TMI sorry).
             Then we go to church, and the last few weeks it has been brought up that with much a servant is trusted, much a servant is given.

Matthew 25:23

New International Version (NIV)

   ²³ “His master replied, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master’s happiness!’
              So the more I am willing to give as far as serving my time, my understanding is that means the more time I should be given. I really need to give lots of time then.
                 I so many times get a visual of my life. I have my hands cupped together and God is pouring oil into them. I am trying so hard to not let any of it out of my fingers to hit the floor. I can't do it. HE is pouring too much, too fast. Funny, because there are several places in the bible that to show wealth  or abundant blessings, it says my cup runs over .

Psalm 23:5

New International Version (NIV)

 ⁵ You prepare a table before me
   in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil; 

   my cup overflows. 
It talks about something running over. And oil was traded and was an important commodity in bible times. They used olive oil for so much. To have much olive oil, was a sign of wealth. My visual is incomplete. The rest is this: as I start to panic and feel like I just can't do it all. I can't be expected to DO EVERYTHING! How can I keep all of this together and not spill any of it? I know they are blessings but, how can I hold on to it all? That is when I realize, HIS hands are cupped under mine. I'm not supposed to do it all. HE will. IF HE  blessed me with something, HE will take care of it. I just have to make sure that I put HIS things first. And he will do the rest. 
                So as I count my blessings (love that song. I sing it often to myself and my kids), I realize HE is there to count them with me. God is going to bless me as long and as big as I am willing to keep following his burning bushes. If HE makes it burn, He'll make sure I can do it. 
                 NO the 17 year old me would never have been able to do all that I am and have done. But, 17 year old me, wasn't asking God for burning bushes and counting blessings. 17 year old me has learned a few things. Thankfully. 

Psalm 23:6

New International Version (NIV)

⁶ Surely your goodness and love will follow me
   all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the LORD
   forever.

Thank you Lord for the oil that overflows. 

Bats and MUMMA'S

           We don't celebrate Halloween in our house. We gave it up a long time ago. In fact, I don't know if my oldest even remembers doing it at all. My youngest have never done it.
            We were in the car and the boys were talking about it when Little Girlie pipes up, "We don't do any of that."
             "Any of what?" The boys ask her.
            "You know. Bats or Mumma's."
            " Mumma's?" I ask. "What is a Mumma?"
            "The one wrapped  in toilet paper."
           Oh. Of course.  A Mumma. Didn't you know that?

Naked At The Opera

        

              Did I get your attention with that one? This was what I told my friend the other day. That she didn't want to show up unprepared for the opera. No she doesn't actually sing or even frequent the opera that I know of. It was a picture I was painting with words for her. It really made me think too. Here is where the conversation begins.
             Have you ever been in a holding pattern on a plane? I was a flight attendant in my younger days. I sat on planes in many holding patterns for many different reasons. Weather, plane traffic, power outages, you name it. I hated it. An unplanned delay in my day (or night). So frustrating because it was nothing that I had or had not done. Stuck sitting there. Now, there are good reasons to wait in the pattern. What if we had tried to land in some of that weather? We could have crashed. Not a good outcome.
               Many times in life God puts us in a holding pattern. Now talk about frustrating. We have our plans and something falls through. Or doesn't happen the way we thought they should. When it is really bad, is when we feel like we put ourselves in the situation that has us stuck in the pattern because of a prompting by God. Why if we are doing as we feel led, does He make us wait? My dear friend was in that situation. My husband and I had been in that situation. And I a sure that at some point in time you have or will have been in that situation. Now I'm not talking a few week pattern. I'm talking months, even a couple of years. Again, why? Why would He put us in this situation to have us, sit there? Waiting?
                I hate to tell you God NEVER does things by accident, or forgets about us. I will tell you, I was starting to really believe that He had forgotten us. Why would he put us in the situation we were in to make us wait? He does all the time. Let me tell you the verse that came to mind every time I prayed and questioned HIS motives for leaving me where I was and not letting us move forward.
            "Be still and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth." Psalm 46:10
                  I really have a hard time with this verse. First because being still is very hard for a mom of 4 kids. I mean when there is so much to be done, it is hard to be still. Even now, everyone is taking quiet time. Littles are asleep, Bigs are reading, even my husband is laying on the bed resting. Not me. Here I am writing. Obviously something I need to work on.
                   I firmly believe that when God puts us in a holding pattern it is either to wait on us to learn the lesson we are supposed to get from the situation we are in and/ or we are waiting for God to line everything up.
                   Here comes the opera. If you were the soprano in the opera each night, you know that you need to wait until many other things are done before you can go on stage to do your solo. First, tickets need to be sold. Cleaning people need to come and make sure everything is nice and clean. The lighting guys need to show up and check that each light works. You wouldn't want to be up there singing your heart out and be in the dark. Then there is the costume lady. What if she didn't come to do her job yet? Oh my, and you went out on stage before she had rechecked your stitches? You might have wardrobe malfunction. Not pretty when you are belting out the high note with your lungs straining. You would be standing in front of everyone naked. (Hence the title). Then of course there are the supporting people. What if when you showed up on stage the violins were out having a cigarette? All of them. And the tuba guy? Having a sandwich. Now what happens as you sing? Not as much as would happen with everyone in unison. An opera without all of the winds and strings, wouldn't be as pretty. As awesome.
               That is your holding pattern. God has us wait sometimes to get everyone where they need to be. You may be the soloist and you think this is your big debut. But, stop and think about the costume lady. This is her career. She wants to debut her best work as well. If you show up on stage with a faulty costume, it reflects badly on her. The tuba guy, this is the show his mother finally gets to come and see her son in the job of his life. The dream job he has worked so long and hard for.
               Life isn't all about you. Even though we are looking from our window, it is about all that goes into it. Have you thought of the peripheral people as well? There was a man tonight that was going to propose to his sweetheart at your concert and if you don't wait for the curtain to go up when the tickets say so, you have ruined his proposal. Your life affects other people. Even those you don't know. You need to wait on God and HIS plans for you. Because His are always better then we could ever dream of coming up with. Well, in the end.
              "I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
you. To prosper. That is never bad. To not harm. We all want that guarantee. And to give hope and a future? Wow. Meaning, I have a purpose and I am supposed to be here and doing this. HE knows the best for us. Just wait.
                  Besides, no offense but, no one wants to see your naked booty up on stage holding the high note for a count beyond measure.
                  Makes me squeamish thinking about it.

Frozen Yogurt

            I'm not a huge fan of frozen yogurt. I mean, really what is the benefit that is so great that out weighs ice cream? I LIKE ice cream. I really like ice cream. Why yogurt? It's like being on a diet and trying to pretend that you aren't. Like eating carob instead of milk chocolate. Really? Then we go and there isn't even chocolate mint. To me that is the only flavor even worth eating yogurt. So I get "Just Chocolate". That is really the name of it. Like, (in a dejected exhaling moan) "I guess I'll get Just Chocolate...." Yea! nothing says yum like Just Chocolate.
           So here I am eating frozen yogurt and it is getting cold outside. Yes, there were no seats inside. And I started telling my 2nd that he shouldn't steal his sisters mini chocolate chips. "Besides," I say,"they look like little mouse poops."
            Husband says, " Hey Heth, there is one right there."
             One what, I'm thinking.
           "You better look down. It's right there. "
            "Yea, right. " I know I can be gullible and I just said mouse but, really? I'm not fall!!!!.... AAAAAHHHHH!!! THERE IS A MOUSE UNDER MY CHAIR! SERIOUSLY! UNDER MY CHAIR!!! 
            Both legs pull up. OH NO! I don't do mice! Rodents are disgusting. OOOOO! It is nasty. Well, I realize I am pulling a famously wonderful mom moment. Again, because both of the "Littles" are shaking, have big eyes and are squealing in unison. I wait until the creepy little thing is not where I can see it anymore. Pick up my Frozen Yogurt (That stuff wasn't good or my idea. And a super gross waste of time) and toss the rest in the trash. I declare I'm cold and leaving. The Littles follow suit. Little Girlie licking a bit more of the Pink yogurt she is eating (with the mouse poop chips on it) and tosses the rest without question (this was Girlie. The one that questions everything). And jumps in the car saying,"And carry azezes (in english that is diseases)."
            O.K. I have scarred my children for life. Although the Bigs have faired quite well over the years with my mouse/rodent phobia. You know the usually giggles and peels of laughter as I walk by the little hairy monsters and shiver at the pet store. That kind of thing.
           The worst part? My brother was reminding me on the phone how Jaws had scared me when I was a kid so I wouldn't go in the ocean for half the summer. Him, he thought the movie was cheesy. He just knew King Kong was way worse anyway. My boys, having heard this conversation start saying, "I think we should call the mouse Jaws. Did you see jaws under the table mom? Ha ha ha ha!"
          The other one is a bit quicker in saying, "Not Jaws. NIBBLES!! Nibbles the Ferocious! Ha ha ha ha!"
           Great, now I'll be haunted by my children and Nibbles the killer baby mouse (Oh did I leave out the part where I was supposed to say it was a baby mouse. SO CREEPY!!). And no it isn't cute!!

I was going to put a picture of a
baby mouse but, I couldn't bring myself
to do it!! 

Shopping With The Girlie!

The bigger it spins, the better the dress. 

           

             I took my girlie for our first girls shopping trip. Nothing fancy, just Kohl's. I really hadn't shopped there much before. Just a couple of run in, run out shopping is all. And always with the whole crew.
So, this was different.
            She is 2. Well, almost 3. So she is a fashionesta. I never really got why moms would buy things or allow their daughters to dress so fancy to go out and about. Then I had Girlie.... Yep, she has a big opinion about what she wears and what she wants. She wears a pink tu-tu all the time. Just because. I was a mom of 3 boys first. I was used to going to the store with Superman, or a pirate, but a pink tu-tu? And jewelry?
             Several months ago, Girlie decided she wanted earrings. She would ask everyday. Well, I didn't have any clip on ones and piercing a 2 year olds ears isn't something I was willing to do. When she is old enough to take care of them and not get hit in the head with a soccer ball and get it embeded into the side of her neck, then we will be good to go. Well, I asked a friend where to get those stick on earrings. You know (or maybe you don't if you only have boys.)  She has 4 girls (God bless her!). Claire's was where she said to go. Full of girls pretty little do-dads.
              A place of unknown treasures to a mom of 3 boys. This  is a place I had never ventured. You know, like the pink aisle at the toy store. You just don't go there if you have boys. Well, I am learning a whole new side to parenting a girl. So much fun. The toys she likes, I would have liked. I don't have to hear her drown on about the latest Transformers, or Beyblade toy. I can only hear how Optimus Prime and blah, blah blah, fought blah, blah, to blah, blah.... They start to sound like the parents in the Peanuts cartoons. Sorry, I do listen to my kids. But, how many times do I have to listen to Death Star scenarios???
               Oh and movies. Don't get me wrong I loved Toy Story, and Cars  was great but, wouldn't it be nice to throw in a princess or two? I missed Belle and Cinderella. What about a little Tinker Bell? I am a girl for goodness sake. I did learn to love Indiana Jones but, Star Wars ( I am so sorry those of you that think it is a sacred movie) , I hate it. I can sit through some if it but, it really seems like all the same story all over again and again. (I know I am not Jedi worthy).
                All of this said, I come back to my original thought. Shopping. I used to love to shop. What girl doesn't? What wasn't to love when I had my cute high school firm body. Before kids. Well, now there are several reasons not to like it. I don't have that body anymore. I have 4 kids to take with me (Hence the body change), the kids need stuff more then I do, and it is expensive. Oh yea, and the boys don't want to shop unless it is the toy store, Gamestop, or maybe the book store. I just decided that I just didn't like to shop anymore. I would just pick up an item here or there. Needless to say my wardrobe is not anything to rave about.
                Then comes girlie. We went into that store with the intent to buy a couple pairs of shorts for me and maybe a couple of t-shirts. It was like a whole new experience. She loved it. We looked at tops together. I would try on a skirt and she would say, "Oh mommy, that is pretty. Spin."
Spin? Spin? I remember doing that as a little girl. The best dresses and skirts would spin so big. Remember that? How does she know that? Is it something a little girl is born with? To know that the best skirts spin big?  I would pick out a top and she would find me a better one.
                Then came the conversations in the dressing room. Now this got a little embarressing when I realized that everyone else in there was laughing because they could hear her. I know that is why they are laughing because one of them said, "I am loving listening to her. My daughter was the same way. She is well on her way to being your fashion coordinator."
                We were in the dressing room and I had picked out a sensible white top. Girlie declared quite loudly that it was ugly! And that I needed the purple one she picked. It was very pretty. She even told me one looked old. Not sure what that meant but, I didn't buy it.
              Then I needed undies. Well, I'm looking for beige, and ivory, maybe brown or something mellow. Every time I looked in the cart, she had thrown in these fuschia lacy panties with a diamond on the front. I gave up the 4th time and left them in. I did draw the line at the bright Pink and purple zebra striped ones. I could not have made it through the check out with a straight face with those in there.
             We even got to look at jewelry together. You know the fun bangles and dangles. I never look at those anymore. The boys are always antsy by the time I pick something out quickly and maybe try something on. I would never push them by making them sit through the bangles. Besides it isn't fun to look alone. She picked out some doozies there too. A huge bejeweled owl necklace. You know the kind that your 3rd grade teacher would have worn every day until the bug eyes would make you have bad dreams. I talked her into some fun colorful bracelets. And I bought a purse. Pink not brown because girlie said it was prettier, and she was right.
             Shopping may be fun again. I may have to try that a couple more times. Mommy and girlie time. What a totally new concept to me.
             The Lord knew what I needed at this point in my life. I have 3 wonderful boys. 3 sons. I love my boys and have done so many boy things for so many years (14 to be exact). I taught them all to enjoy baking and tea parties. All of them have had a doll at one time or another. We even owned a kitchen for a short time with the first son. The doll was never a baby and the kitchen never baked a cake; only bug pies and Hot Wheels pizza. That is fine. They had fun and so did I. I did long for an Easy Bake Oven. Or a baby dolls with all of the accessories to go with her. But, I was resigned to the fact that I would be buying and playing with Hot Wheels for the rest of my life.
              Well, not now. Girlie and I will play with the Hot Wheels but, we will also play with dolls and pretend "baby" is sleeping or is cranky and needs a nap. I will get to go shopping again and pick out pretty clothes, not just functional clothes. I will again enjoy the little more frilly side of life. Thank you God for my girlie.
                 What icing on the cake that you made her so adorable. Blond ringlet curls and big blue eyes. Not at all like me. But even more beautiful then I could have dreamed.
                 Now if I can just convince her that I am as nice as Daddy, we will be all set.

It Is Coming..... Sooner Rather Than Later

      
             I saw it. I just caught a glimpse but, it was enough to make me choke back a tiny gasp and put a lump in my throat. I knew it was coming but, to actually see it... To know that the inevitable was going to come SOME day was O.K. To know that it is here.... Excuse me while I have a good cry. Not all sad tears. Joyful, excited, anxious tears. I know I am like all other moms (especially homeschool moms) that say, "Really God? Now? Why do you make it happen so fast?! I don't think I'm ready." 
            One day he was a chubby little bug, grabbing my pants and giggling. Then he was the smiling little buddy, following Daddy everywhere around with his own work boots and tool belt on. Hammering every surface around. Now...sniff..., he is on the threshold of manhood. Really. He is taller then I am. His voice is deep and booming. His body is full of muscles cut all down his six pack stomach. He can even carry on a regular adult conversation with adults that doesn't include any words that describe bodily functions, or their sounds. 
             How is a mom to do this? How does God expect me to be anything but, bittersweet about this. I imagine Hannah must be my hero in the Bible to be able to give up her son just after he was weaned. I would have nursed that guy as long as is physically possible. I am happy he is becoming a man. And I really am seeing glimpses of a good man. One with strength of his belief in God. A man that will talk to a person no matter what they look like, or who they are. He loves to laugh and joke. He loves to read and share obscure facts. This is who he is. At least the first little bit of him. I am so anxious to see where God will lead him. 
              My husband just took him to an information night for the Mariners Sea Scouts. It is a sailing program. They teach them all about sailing but, it is in a boy scout type of format. He will be out in the ocean in a 1 man or 2 man boat at times. He will be out on a 37 foot yacht sailing to Catalina Island with a crew of men and women his age, and chaperone's. It could be a weekend trip. They have competitions with other Sea Scouts at the naval base. This isn't an easy adventure he is coming up on. This will be hard and at times intense work to do the drills that he has to do. 
              His classes for school are suddenly becoming more intense. He will have much more work to do. He is teaching the Kindergarten class (where his little brother is)at church, He is becoming a leader to others. He has been asked to be on the student council with our high school group. Girls talk to him. And he talks back!! I am so proud. (Girls can be scary. I know I am one. )
               I am ready, mostly, for him to cross that threshold but, I will watch him with an ache in my heart and a lump in my throat. My perfect little boy. My first born. The one I thought that I loved so much that I couldn't have anymore children because, I couldn't love them as much. (Little did I know that God stretches a moms heart to love and adore all of her children). When I looked into his little blue eyes, I knew this is what I was made to do. Raise him (and his brother's and sister). He was the beginning of motherhood for me. My series of milestones began with him as well. With him, I had my first Mother's day and felt so funny that someone else was going to call me Mom. I had my first Christmas that was about the "kids" and not myself or my husband. I have many firsts with him, just as I watched all of his firsts. 
                Maybe we should have a Mother's First Milestone book as well. My first time to nurse (WEEEEIIIIRD!). My first all nighter that didn't involve textbooks or a bag of Doritos and a bucket of chocolate ice cream. My first time being puked on, pooped on and snotted on. My first time to go out of the house with all 3 still on my shirt and not having a clue because I was so tired it never occurred to me to look in a mirror before I left. 
The first time my baby was hurt by another child. (I wanted to kick that kid!) The first time to go shopping and wanting to hurry through the mall because shopping wasn't (sniff) fun anymore. The first time he got hurt and I couldn't make it go away. The first time my child lost a tooth,  slept through the night, used the big potty, and was weaned to a big boy cup. All of his firsts went along side all of my firsts. I was so proud. I am so proud. 
find one that suits your life even better. 
               “Trust in the Lord with all your heart. Lean not on your own understanding, in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will direct your path.” Proverbs 3:5-6 (NIV)
                 He will direct your paths. He will be the best director of where you go. O.K. I am going to start bowing out now. It is your time to shine. A boy doesn't need his mommy around all the time to make sure he is doing the right thing and not missing opportunities. Baby, it is time for you to do that. Pray. Pray and read the Word. That is the best map. I will continue to be here but, on the sidelines. O.K.? I will not be the coach quite as often anymore. I am going to start becoming the cheerleader. Always here, cheering you on to YOUR success'. I am so excited to see the man that you become. I am so thrilled to watch as God guides you to the full man HE wants you to be. Just listen. Pray and listen. 
                 Now, go out and grab everything God puts in your path. Do everything with all your might. And don't forget to wave at me sometimes on the sidelines so I know you haven't forgotten about me. 
                  I love you, my darling first born. My the Lord continue to bless you and keep you close to HIM. 

YEA!! GO!!! RIGHT ON!!! WOO HOO!!!!

Well, really it will look more like this even though I feel like the other one. 

What Is Your Ministry?!

      



  

             I am a homeschool mom. I do not work for money outside of my home. I am home often. (Not always). And I am raising 4 children and teaching them what they need to know. I am also a wife. Our family is pretty traditional for the most part. He goes out and works all day and I am home teaching the kids and trying to manage the home in between. The house isn't always as managed as it should be. (When did I change the sheets last?) I also volunteer at our church for Kids Small Group once a week. Which is a bible study for each of the kids by age. This year I will be teaching one hour a week at our new co-op and volunteering 2 more hours there a week. Now I am on the board for our homeschool group. (That has been like a full time job the last 2 months.) No I'm not super mom or overly energetic. I really have a hard time getting through the day without a glass of sweet tea and a couple squares of chocolate around 4 p.m. I get cranky and frustrated. I get tired and worn out feeling. I'm a mom. Just like you.
             I want to share with you something I learned recently. I was feeling kind of... unimportant in the scheme of Gods' workers. I felt like my contributions to the world wasn't a whole lot.  I mean, there are days that I don't leave my house or carry on a conversation with someone that wouldn't think twice about wiping their nose on me mid-sentence. Because of schooling at home, I don't even have the mad dash of waving at other moms in the parking lot dropping or picking up some days. I spend my days singing the ABC's, checking spelling words, reading history, checking over math problems, coloring, cutting pasting, correcting term papers (my oldest has a couple of classes outside of our home), cooking, laundry, cleaning up, sweeping, planning, organizing, reorganizing, refereeing, screaming, laughing, crying, maintaining. You get the picture. Then you get a call from a friend saying they are going on a mission trip to dig wells in Africa, and another friend goes to Malaysia to share hygiene information, and then at church they are pitching for our kids to go on the mission trip to Mexico to build an orphanage. Oh yea, then there is my cousin that went to live in Nicaragua for 2 years to help at an orphanage and school. To teach about Jesus.
             Funny. I love my life. This one that God has blessed me with. Even all of the ups and downs. I am saddened by the people not blessed in the same way I am. So now I start feeling insignificant. Tiny. Unimportant.  Why aren't I going to Africa, or somewhere... I am not very worthy....  so I have spent many days on this thought and prayed fervently. Well, that is where the board position came in. Thanks God. I didn't say I didn't have anything to do. That I needed to fill my days. They are full. Why would you give me more things to do with so little time to do the things that I am responsible for now?
             That is when I heard it. Several times actually. It seems to be a theme. Several people have said the phrase to me, I have heard it in a song a couple of times, even the sermon had the phrase in it a few weeks ago.
"You have been put here for such a time as this." That is the phrase. Am I the only one that gets kinda weirded out by telling people what they hear God telling you? (Yes, I know weirded isn't a real word, word Nazi's). It's true. I have heard it over and over for the last 3 weeks. Well, if you know your bible, you know that phrase comes from Esther 4:14. The second part of the verse reads, "... And who knows but that you have come to royal position for such a time as this?"
               Wow. I have always loved the book of Esther because it's the book in the Bible that God himself isn't speaking or have a Prophet speaking for him. Esther and her family have to listen for God like we do. Maybe less. Esther is during the time when God was silent. Esther didn't see a burning bush. I don't know about you but, I always found it a bit unfair that Moses sees and hears a burning bush and I have to only rely on prayer and reading my Bible.  Well, I don't think God is silent now. We just aren't listening. I'm listening now.
                 I have come to realize in my many quiet times, that I am very significant. My contribution is really important. Before I was leading my homeschool group I was/am raising 4 disciples and christian soldiers to go out into the world to spread the gospel. To change the world. I have always known that I have been blessed with wonderful children. I have always known that they aren't mine
               Since my prayers for insignificance, God (as usual) is laughing at me. But, he is also cheering me on. As he cheers you on everyday. Ladies, being a wife and mother is an important ministry (at least it can be). Homeschooling your children is a huge ministry. So many just don't get why you do what you do. You do it because you have been called. Let's face it, many of us would love to drop our kids for several hours a day and be able to clean our house, work out, meet for lunch or coffee, grocery shop without sticky fingers grabbing everything on the shelf and distracting you from your list.
                 We have chosen the road less traveled. When neighbors and strangers look at us, they look with much more scrutinizing eyes. We could never exclaim to most of our neighbors or family for that matter, that we had a rotten day and didn't get any school work done today. Their answer would be, "Put them in school already." It's like complaining to someone that doesn't believe in breast feeding that your nipples are chapped. "Use a bottle."
                 I now realize that my job to minister isn't just to my family and neither is yours. My ministry is you. The other moms and especially other homeschool moms. Your ministry is me. Ladies, we are sisters in Christ. That makes us bonded to each other. We are the leaders preparing all of our children to go out and dig wells, teach orphans, help the poor, salvage a town after a disaster, all of the things we are commanded to do. You are not doing a tiny unimportant job. You are doing a huge job. You are raising up disciples. I know I have said it a few times. It is true.
                  Now have I scared you a little with the huge sense of responsibility that you have? Good. Now is the good part. You aren't alone. Not only do you have me; but best of all, you have God.
"Finally, be strong in the Lord, and in his mighty power." Ephesians 6:10
                 NOW, GIVE ME 50!!!  Hugs, words of encouragement, cups of shared coffee (or glasses of tea), trips to the park to encourage and build me up, of Mom's Night Out- to love and laugh with each other. Give me the love and support I need and I promise to be there for you as well. We can do this. You are important. And who knows, maybe one day you will lead a mission trip to the deepest part of the Amazon or to the top of a freezing mountain. What is your ministry now? What are you supposed to do to further God now? 

Why Not Sweet Tea!!

      


             So obviously, I really like a freshly made glass of sweet iced tea. The funny thing is, living on the west coast, no one makes a good glass of tea. Much less a sweet tea. Sure McDonald's started serving it here and we do have a Chick-Fil-A near us now. Neither make a good glass of fresh tea. Yes, sometimes it is still hot from brewing but, it tastes like the bottom of a burned coffee pot. You know when you get coffee from the bottom of the pot and especially if someone left it on too long. It tastes cloudy and burned. Same with Tea.
             You would think that when I go out to a restaurant, I would order tea. NO. I hate it out. It tastes like dirty water at best and like dirty dish water at worst. And if you don't sweeten it with an artificial sweetener, your not going to get it sweet because every southerner knows, you can't dissolve sugar in iced tea. You put the sugar in while the tea is hot.
             Why the rant? I have been meeting a couple of ladies at a Starbuck's for a meeting every Monday night for about 5 weeks now. Do you know they have NOTHING worth drinking there unless you drink Coffee? Seriously. Their iced tea is yucky and then they try to fluff it up with juice in it. Really? And their hot tea is terrible. Really, I have tasted Vegetarian dishes that were better. And I'm talking about the ones with that white congealed stuff that squishes when you bite into it.
               I went to Peet's one time thinking they would do better. Peet's is the conservative of the coffee houses around here. You know they don't play the weird music and their cups are actually called, small, medium and large. They at least sell good hot tea. (Jasmine Downey pearls, super good and healthy too). And you could make good iced tea from there selection. A good English Breakfast would work. But, again the iced tea they make in the store tastes like... thick. Not full bodied mind you. Thick. Like you could chew it. Also, a bit like a dirty pot was used. And the juice thing in the tea... What is the point! Drink a glass of juice or lime-ade for goodness sakes. That isn't TEA!!! You don't have to be a 2 year old to order a glass of lemonade. It is O.K. to order that.
               Then you order water in a restaurant and they serve you tap water. O.K. I'm in a restaurant that I am actually looking down at the menu and not talking to someone in a goofy hat, can't you open a bottle of water! We all know water is the best thing to drink. So why do the waiters always give me a nasty look? I will pay for the bottled water. Why the attitude about water? I went to a brunch with some moms. The waiter  approached us as we were standing and talking and asked if we would like something to drink? (this was a flat price brunch. Tip included.) He eagerly brought the mimosas and coffee. My water? I got snubbed. "If you'd like water, there is some on the table. You can get it yourself."
              I would love to get my favorite drink out and about. I would love to splurge and get a sweet tea at a drive through or a tea shop while I'm out. Instead, I get a hankering for some tea and I have to head home and make it myself. No splurging there. Well, think of the money I'm saving.
               O.K. I'm done with my midnight rant that will matter to no one except myself.

The Blessings Are Overflowing.

       

            There are so many things in my life that 20 years ago I never would have thought I would do or be able to do. Some I am proud of, some I am still stunned. I had such a small vision of what I wanted to do with my life. I have fulfilled what I wanted to do, I suppose. I just hadn't thought of all that goes with it. When I dreamed of my life, this is where I went;
I wanted to be married to a man that adored me. Check
I wanted 2 kids. Check. Well, double check that one.
I wanted a boy and a girl. Check, check, check and ... check.
I wanted to live in a big house with a yard and a garden. Been there done that. Now I am moving on from that.
I wanted to stay home with my kids and raise them. Well, got that one covered and then some.
I wanted to be the mom that was home all day to bake cookies for when the kids came home from school, have a nice dinner, etc. Use that time during the day to get things done so I could be with my kids as they needed me when they got home. Well, curve ball number one. And it is a doozy!
Homeschooling changes that one enormously. I may have been too attached to the one where I stay home with my kids...

             After all of that life didn't seem to factor into my ideas of what it would all be like.
I never thought I'd have 4 kids. Or homeschool. That was for weird people. Freaks. I never thought I could have survived, much less, thrived through all we have been through in our marriage.
My husband and I look back over our 20 years that we have been together and we can easily see where God's hand has been. We can look at the "tapestry" and see the beautiful colors ALL weaved together. The dark sad times with the joyful happy times. Woven together are so pretty.
I always wonder about the stretching times. The times when you feel like God is just asking too much. I mean does HE really not get that I haven't had enough time to get my husbands underwear washed yet? And there is a funky smell in the bathroom that I haven't bleached out yet. There are dinners to cook, curriculum to decide, hiney's to wipe, and all of the other practicals  that keep a family of 6 just treading water. Not to mention, but we must to have, any joy, just that,... joyful things. Going to the beach, walks in the harbor, playing catch with the boys, watching the boys football games, teaching the littles to swim. These things take up time that is necessary as well.
            Then HE hits me a ball out in left field. Really. Not one I expected. I am now on the board of my homeschool group. I'm sorry, doesn't having 4 kids exempt me from being asked? Doesn't that job belong to someone with one, MAYBE 2 kids? Well, this year, God said, "NO!" It is my turn He says.
I pray often that God will send me a burning bush like Moses to make it pretty clear the direction I am supposed to go. I have ignored and justified my way out of not following God's prompts before. Well, it hurts in many ways when you are praying for God to use you and you choke when HE calls. HE makes you realize it would be much easier to just do the difficult task HE asks then... NOT. Either He will give you a swift kick in the back side or worse, HE will find someone else and pass by you the next time. "I guess that one can't be trusted to be given any responsibility."
           Well, as the offer was made to lead this group, I sat prepared to give my regrets and apologies that there was no way I should even be  expected to do the job she was asking.
         Then there it was. The burning bush. Right there. I think I even started to laugh a little and said under my breath. Well, there it is. The burning bush. Even my husband, whom I pray with often, said as I repeated all that the person who asked me had said to me, "Well, how's that burning bush looking to you?"
Which was funny because he also was prepared for me to say no. Remember, he is still waiting for his clean underwear.
            That is when my mind started to go into a state of shock. As e-mails and phone calls and meetings start taking place to frantically get some things done before the school year started for most of us, I started wondering how I could hide from it all. "WHAT HAVE I DONE!!" Really. There aren't any spare moments that are around, unless I stop sleeping (which is what I am doing to write this). Really, I do my daughters hair often while I am going potty myself. (TMI sorry).
             Then we go to church, and the last few weeks it has been brought up that with much a servant is trusted, much a servant is given.

Matthew 25:23

New International Version (NIV)

   ²³ “His master replied, ‘Well done, good and faithful servant! You have been faithful with a few things; I will put you in charge of many things. Come and share your master’s happiness!’
              So the more I am willing to give as far as serving my time, my understanding is that means the more time I should be given. I really need to give lots of time then.
                 I so many times get a visual of my life. I have my hands cupped together and God is pouring oil into them. I am trying so hard to not let any of it out of my fingers to hit the floor. I can't do it. HE is pouring too much, too fast. Funny, because there are several places in the bible that to show wealth  or abundant blessings, it says my cup runs over .

Psalm 23:5

New International Version (NIV)

 ⁵ You prepare a table before me
   in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil; 

   my cup overflows. 
It talks about something running over. And oil was traded and was an important commodity in bible times. They used olive oil for so much. To have much olive oil, was a sign of wealth. My visual is incomplete. The rest is this: as I start to panic and feel like I just can't do it all. I can't be expected to DO EVERYTHING! How can I keep all of this together and not spill any of it? I know they are blessings but, how can I hold on to it all? That is when I realize, HIS hands are cupped under mine. I'm not supposed to do it all. HE will. IF HE  blessed me with something, HE will take care of it. I just have to make sure that I put HIS things first. And he will do the rest. 
                So as I count my blessings (love that song. I sing it often to myself and my kids), I realize HE is there to count them with me. God is going to bless me as long and as big as I am willing to keep following his burning bushes. If HE makes it burn, He'll make sure I can do it. 
                 NO the 17 year old me would never have been able to do all that I am and have done. But, 17 year old me, wasn't asking God for burning bushes and counting blessings. 17 year old me has learned a few things. Thankfully. 

Psalm 23:6

New International Version (NIV)

⁶ Surely your goodness and love will follow me
   all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the LORD
   forever.

Thank you Lord for the oil that overflows. 

Cupcakes

                 I had a very long week. My oldest went away for Junior High Camp. That alone made it difficult. Not all of my chicks in their roosts.... Something felt askew all week for that alone. Then I found out someone that had claimed to be a "dear " friend is threatening to sue my husband's company, my 4 year old lost his second tooth (somewhat traumatic for him), my second son fell on the blacktop and road burned his knee pretty bad, bled a lot. It is still weeping the next day. My mom had to go check in my 83 year old grandma to see if she can still live alone. I was presented with information about part of my family I thought I would never know (And didn't realize how sad I had been to not know it). THERE WAS A MOUSE IN MY HOUSE!!! (It's dead now!! AAAHHH..) I have joined my homeschool groups board and am working feverishly to get so much done for a big meeting we are having, to share what will be happening this next year, and trying to show some people that I truly think we need to move in a direction with the group but, am getting resistance due to cost. Vision doesn't include cost. God will cover the cost if the vision is HIS. We have the ability to test this. (sorry tangent). I have made calls this week to people I hadn't talked to in years. And kinda wish it were still that way. I have to line up all of the curriculum for all 4 of my kids before school starts back up. I am having trouble with  science. I don't really like to teach science. It can be messy. And sometimes too detailed. I love history. Can we just do history all day??? My garden is dead. RIP. I've done laundry all day. Ugh! I hate laundry. My house is cluttered with stuff in places it shouldn't be. I have boxes in my living room that need to be unpacked. I was going to finish unpacking. There never seems to be enough time. I don't know where to put it all anyway. My landlord is taking 4 weeks to replace the half open blinds. Everyone can see in. I just want to do it myself. Went to 2 meetings at night this week. The first one went until 10:00 p.m. I usually am in my jammies and cuddly on the couch by then. That was tough. Got a lot of work done though. The other one was awful. The lady talked too much about herself and it was BORING! Don't tell my kids I said that word. It's a bad word in my house. I'll have to scrub the floor or something. Oh yea. I already do that. I miss my cleaning lady. She was awesome.

                It has been a long week. I am feeling low. And tired. 

                My friend comes by this evening while I was on the porch with my husband talking about the day. And brings me a box of CUPCAKES!!! Really. Cupcakes. Vanilla with cream cheese frosting. They are beautiful. And they taste heavenly. Really. We skipped dinner. We all ate cupcakes. We really did. That is a true friend. One that brings you a treat just because. And when she said she was free for all of the kids to play (she has 4 as well), I said, " Oh. I'll be stuffing and addressing 130 envelopes to send out for the homeschool meeting." She says, "I'll come by and help." WHAT!? Did you hear what I said? Addressing envelopes. That isn't fun. She heard me. That is a good friend. I think I love her.                     Cupcakes.... ummm. I think there might be one or two left. Maybe I should go have another half. 

               Thank you friend, for the cupcakes. That was just what I needed today. I think it will be a great weekend.